Attachment parenting 101

In this episode, we covered the following points:

Introduction – the Islamic foundation

What is attachment – difference between bonding and attachment

Why is it important – the lifelong effects of attachment on the child

What does secure attachment look like

Obstacles to secure attachment

Tips to foster the attachment bond

 Introduction:

The 3 stages of the Islamic Parenting Contract

 “The child is the master for seven years; and a slave for seven years and a vizier for seven years; so if he grows into a good character within 21 years, well and good; otherwise leave him alone because you have discharged your responsibility before Allah.”

 

Stage 1: Birth to 7 years – the child as Sayed The Imprint Period

Child like sponge, absorb everything as true. Period of attachment and trauma. “Give me the child and I will give you the man”.

 

Needs of child:      

 Bonding with mother...

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A tranquil home

A recording of a live session at a milad for a wedding. Please excuse the sounds of the toddler who really wanted to be heard :)

In this session we cover a necessary ingredient for a Muslim home - that of sukun or tranquility.

What is tranquility, what are reasons why it is so important, and how do we create sukun within ourselves and in our homes.

Here is a link to the blog posts mentioned in the audio

The Trouble Tree:

https://www.marziahassan.org/blog/do-you-have-a-trouble-tree

The 36 questions that lead to love

https://www.marziahassan.org/blog/The%2036%20Questions%20that%20lead%20to%20love

 

 

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Raising an emotionally intelligent child

How to raise an emotionally intelligent child. 

What it means to be emotionally literate, why we need to focus on this and how parents can nurture emotional intelligence in their children

 

 

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Nurturing Spirituality in Children

What are the differences between Religion and Spirituality?

While many parents focus on teaching children the basics of religious practice, it is important to also focus on fostering a spiritual outlook to life. There is a difference and what parents do, matters.

We outline how parents can foster a relationship with God in their children and nurture a spiritual perspective while teaching the basics about religion. 

 

 

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Secrets of Happy Families

What is the new reality for parents and how does this impact family wellbeing and happiness?

Parents today are trying harder than ever to be good parents and create a family culture that is peaceful and happy. And despite this many families are struggling with knowing what to do - what works and what doesn't. 

In this session we offer a research based blueprint on what makes families happy. Some of the information is sure to surprise you. 

 

 

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Building a marriage based on Rahma (Loving Kindness and Compassion)

Recording of a live session. 

How do we practice kindness and compassion in our marriages? How do we stand in love and rise in love after falling in love?

What are the key ingredients of a compassionate and loving relationship? 

 

 

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The Essentials of Positive Parenting

This is a recording of a live session with parents on the 5 pillars of positive parenting and how we can apply them to our parenting.

We had a lively discussion with LOTS of questions, especially about managing emotions in children.

 

 

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Communicating with children

Communicating with Children is a resource pack that facilitates the process of learning about the critical importance of communication that is age- appropriate and child-friendly, holistic, positive, strengths-based and inclusive. We believe effective communication is a two-way process for sharing ideas and knowledge that involves understanding people: their needs, skills, beliefs, values, societies and cultures

Recording of a live parenting session

 

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A simple way to keep your marriage fresh and strong

What makes love last? Is it possible to keep a relationship strong and vibrant over the long term or are we destined to live out our days in boredom and annoyance after the honeymoon is over? 

That is a million-dollar question and researchers have been asking the same question for a very long time. 
The beginning of a romantic relationship is often marked by high levels of passion, joy, attraction, excitement, and novelty. We find everything very exciting. 
With time, however, these feelings and experiences become less intense, rendering the relationship a great deal less exciting. 
This does not only happen in marriage and relationships but in all aspects of our lives. 
Let us take the example of travel: 
When we travel by air for the very first time, we are impressed if they give us earphones and a drink. It feels luxurious to sit in our seat with the stewardess coming around to check if we need anything and if our seat belts are tied. 

After the...

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Discipline versus punishment – what is the difference?

Parents often use the words ‘discipline’ and ‘punishment’ interchangeably when they are trying to correct undesirable behaviour in children. The two terms, however, mean very different things and they have different outcomes for children and their parents. 

Punishment: Essentially, punishment is about controlling children’s behaviour through power, control and fear. “I better not catch you doing that again!” is a common thing we tell children when we are threatening punishment. 

Punishments can be: 

Physical: such as spanking, putting a child in a time out or withholding something like food or the internet 
Emotional: such as calling a child names (stupid, lazy . .), making them feel small or withholding love and affection from them. 
Punitive: not being able to go somewhere or play with friends. 

While punishments do seem to work in the short term to stop undesirable behaviour in children, they are problematic in...

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